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| A really scary monkey... |
A playful, then very suddenly dark broadside ballad....
In Greenock town I’ve heard
it said
A man there lived who to his trade
A fisher was a rummy blade
His freens they cawed him Dunkey O
Now a sailor brither he had got
Wha’d just come hame frae Hottentot
And frae that savage place he brought
A full grown living monkey O
For four lang years ‘twas telt tome
This sailor chiel had been to sea
When he came hame to hae a spree
He wasna’ very funky O
So wi his monkey in a box
At Dunkey’s door he quickly knocks
And the nicht was spent wi sangs and jokes
But he ne’er said he’d got a monkey O
Now ye maun ken this
sailor lad
A sweetheart up in Glasgow
had
So to see her next day he would pad
In spite o’ freens or Dunkey O
Early next morning he did rise
As the sun began to climb the skies
Says he Na doubt he’ll get a surprise
When he waukens and twigs the monkey O
Now the monkey thocht like human kin
Twas time some breakfast was brocht in
It then began to yell and whin
And through the room went dancing O
You’d thocht t’was some ane killing pigs
For it yelled and cut some antic riggsut a’ this din and
wild uproar
The monkey made upon the floor
The fisherman he loud did snore
‘Twas hard to waken Dunkey O
At length he thocht ‘twas time to rise
And he looked about him wi surprise
For on a table he espies
A thing in the shape o’ a monkey O
Now Dunkey Jumped up to his feet
Like lightning he ran to the street
And twa-three fishermen he did meet
And O but he felt funky O
He telt his story –wi’ ae consent
To Dunkey’s domicile they went
And they swore they’d make the thing repent
Be it a man or a monkey O
Now the monkey at the men did stare
For they strapped him down upon a chair
Says ane-On his face there’s ower much hair
To shave him I’ll no be funky O
Ane o’ ran and got some soap
And made a lather pipin’ hot
While another held him by the throat
Till the fishermen shaved the monkey O
Now the fishermen they laughed like mad
Such fun before they never had
When a wild young chiel whose name was Rab
Proposed to hang the monkey O
Then round it’s neck a rope they threw
And through a cleek the end they drew
And quickly to the riff it flew
For the fishermen hung the monkey O
